Dear Sydney,
I think you are getting more and more used to having more people around you than just me and Dad. You have started to warm up to everyone. You smile and laugh with those who try to talk with you. It's so sweet.

You've been doing good today. You've been eating just liked you should and you haven't been sleeping too much. This I love.

You had your first taste of a grape today. Your Dad was eating grapes and he decided that you should have a taste too. So, he bit off a piece and let you lick the juice. It was the cutest thing. You loved it. You've never tasted anything other than your bottle and your medicine so I am sure it was very exciting for you!

I think we figured out a way that you won't starve before your pre-op on Tuesday. On the paper that PCMC sent us that said you can't eat past 7 am it later says that you can have clear liquids up until 11 am (apple juice, Pedialyte, etc.). So, I called your pediatrician and asked them if you were too young to have clear liquids. They said to give you pedialyte on the day of the pre-op. She recommended that I give you the kind that comes in powder form that you mix with water because that kind isn't as sweet and you will drink it better. She said that this should have enough sugars in it to keep your tummy somewhat full during your pre-op. Learning this was like music to my ears. It immediately calmed my worries and I feel so much better. The pre-op won't be so bad knowing that you haven't been starving for 6 hours. I am so thankful!

It has been fun to get to know your cousins Claire and Dylan better. You are only 3 months older than they are. We are just missing your other cousin Ashley who is about 2 months younger than you. She lives out in Virginia.I wish she and her family were here to join the party. I can already begin to picture the trouble you 4 are going to make together.

Sam and Kallie are taking such good care of you. They will give me your binky if you spit it out, they will tell you stories, and they are always curious about why and how you do certain things. You have such good cousins.







Well, it is bedtime. I love you, Syd.
Love, Mom

Dear Sydney,
We made it! We made it through our busy weekend! Your Dad graduated, you were blessed, we packed up the trailer with all our stuff, we cleaned, we spent time with family, and we said goodbye to a town that has been so good to us for the past 5 years.

On friday night we went to your Dad's graduation while Papa babysat you. You weren't very nice to him. You cried the whole time and then once you calmed you down you barfed all over him! You really gave Papa a run for his money! So when we asked Papa to bring you to campus so we could take pictures with you you showed up in nothing but a blanket because Papa couldn't find new clothes for you to wear! So funny! I think this first picture does a good job of summarizing our crazy but fun weekend...









The next day was your blessing day. When we went to bed that night I told your Dad that "today was a perfect day." Everyone was happy. You couldn't have been any sweeter or more beautiful in your dress. The lunch was perfect thanks to so many. So many people offered their help to us and got us out of our apartment so fast. I will always look back on that day with happiness.











This next picture is just a random picture that I had taken over the weekend. You had fallen asleep on the couch and looked too cute. You just sprawled right out.



We leave on Monday to head down to Utah for your pre-op at PCMC. We got a thing in the mail from them the other day telling us that your pre-op is at 1 p.m. but they want you there at 12. They also said that you couldn't eat anything past 7 a.m. that day due to the fact that you will be sedated. They don't want anything in your stomach. For some reason I took this really hard. The fact that we won't be able to feed you for 6 hours was more than I could handle. The closer this surgery gets, the harder it is becoming. Yesterday I became so overwhelmed with fear I felt as though I was paralyzed. Being on my knees was all I had the energy to do. It was at that point that I began to pray and ask for the strength to make it through these next two weeks. Today, I feel better. I woke up this morning with peace in my heart and that is all I need.

If you are reading this, please continue praying. I will be the first to admit that we need them.

I love you, Little Sydney.
Love, Mom

Dear Sydney,
This is going to be a quick post but I just wanted to fill you in on what is going on in your life this weekend. Yesterday, your Grandma and Grandpa Moon, Laura, Cameron, and Brady arrived here in Rexburg for this weekend's activities. Today Mamo, Papa, Heidi, Anna, Gracee, Heather, Summer, Paige, Mattie, Shonda, and Sam all came for the same reason! Whew! What a party!

Tonight your Dad graduates from college! Yes, he earned his bachelors degree in Exercise Physiology. We are so proud of him. He has worked so hard to get to this point...way to go Jordan!

Tomorrow is your blessing day. Mamo made you the most beautiful blessing gown I have ever seen. I can't wait to have you wear it. It is something that I will treasure forever.

Tomorrow night we are packing up the trailer to move to Boise, we'll have sunday to relax, and then Monday to clean and be out the door by Monday night.

So far you have been doing well with all the hustle and bustle. You are loved by so many! Everyone has been really careful to not get too close to you. We have to be so careful with you especially now that we are getting so close to the surgery date.

We love you so very, very much!
Love, Mom

Dear Sydney,
The past two days have been nothing but Dr. appt! That's ok though, at least we know they are keeping a good eye on you. Let's start with the first appt with the cardiologist.

Her name is Dr. Judd. They always start off the same- an EKG and then they put the blood pressure cuff on your arm and squeeze the heck out of it! The Dr. checked you over and said that she wants to keep the surgery where it is. (If you were doing good enough, they were going to push the surgery back further.) She said that your social skills and your fine motor skills are right where they should be but your gross motor skills are behind that of other children. I had always wondered if you should be rolling around and reaching for things by now but I wasn't for sure just because you are my first baby. Now I know that yes, you should be doing those things by now, but your muscles just don't have the energy they need to do those kinds of tasks. She said that your liver is still a little big but the medicine is keeping it from worsening. I told her about your sweaty hands and feet and how sometimes when I touch them, my skin is very wet with your sweat. She said that that is attributed to your heart.

The Dr. told us that after your surgery you won't be so pale and that your sweaty-ness will go away. She said that your gross motor skills will catch up with the other kids within 3 months after the surgery. We have to continue to keep you away from large crowds until 2 months after the surgery.

Then today you had a weight check. You gained 4 ounces this week! Woo hoo! That means that you are now 9 lbs. 11 oz.

I finally charged my camera battery so that means I have more pictures to show. Both of these were taken today...so cute! You have such big eyes!





Oh, how I love my little girl!
Love, Mom

Dear Sydney,
Today you have been my little packing buddy. Every day we pack a few boxes here and there but today we have kicked it into high gear. Being that we need to have everything packed by Thursday night...we have a lot to do! So, to keep ourselves entertained while we pack you sit in your swing, I turn on music, you smile, and I pack. It's a great thing we've got going on! I wish I had some pictures to show just how cute you are but my camera has been dead for the past few days and I am yet to charge it. Hence the reason why I haven't been posting pictures lately. Sorry!

You go to the cardiologist tomorrow! Yes, we get to go see Dr. Judd again. This will be the last time we see her before your surgery...whoa. I remember when we scheduled this appointment with Dr. Judd about a month ago and I thought to myself, "By the time that appointment rolls around, your surgery will only be weeks away." Now that your appointment is tomorrow that means that your surgery really is only weeks away. 3 weeks from tomorrow, to be exact. In two weeks we are going down to Utah for your first Pre-op and then about 5 days after that, we are going back down to Utah for the actual surgery. Within the 4 weeks, we will be doing a lot of driving.

You woke up this morning at about 8:30. Then you went back down for a nap at 9:30. You didn't wake up until 11:30. Then you went down for another nap at 12:30 and woke up at 1:30. Now it is 3:30 and you are back asleep. This just goes to show how much you sleep in a day. It has just been lately that you have started to sleep this much this often. I wonder if you will sleep this much after your surgery?

I need to keep packing. I get the most done while you are asleep because when you are awake, I just end up staring at you or playing with you. Playing with you is much more fun than packing.

I love you, little lady.
Love, Mom

Dear Sydney,
Your good eating habits have dwindled. Ugh. Last week you were doing so good but this week you're back to how you used to be. You eat some of your bottle, and then you have to take a break before you come back for the rest. You threw up more than ever yesterday! Wow. It just kept coming. One spew after another. I can't wait for all of this to be over.

A lot of people ask me how I am coping with this whole thing. I think they expect me to be a miserable wreck that can hardly talk about it. Well, I'll admit, that was a pretty good description of me when we first found out about your defect. And it usually is a good description after we get back from your cardiologist appointments. It always takes me a few days to soak in what the Dr. told us and be ok with it. But for the most part, I am handling it pretty well. I feel very positive about this surgery and I know that it will be successful. I can't help but feel grateful that you don't have something worse. Knowing that your defect is curable gives me so much hope. This experience has brought Jordan and I closer than ever and it has bonded us even more with you. We have a stronger family because of this. You don't know how sweet life is unless you have tasted the bitter. I am not asking for seconds of this bitter taste but I am grateful for how sweet everything else tastes because of it.

Your surgery is in 3 1/2 weeks. Whew. You meet with the cardiologist next Tuesday and then you have another weight check next wednesday. Then your Dad graduates on Friday, you are being blessed on Saturday, and we move on Monday. You can say it...our life right now is a little bit...crazy. Your room has been over taken with boxes. Good thing you still sleep in our room.

Well, I am going to get ready for the day while you are still asleep. I love you, Syd.

Love, Mom

Dear Sydney,
Last night and this morning you have been a little more congested than usual. Last week I couldn't hear any congestion at all but it is starting to come back, sadly. I wonder if the doctor is going to have to up your dosage of medicine even more? Hm.

The type of surgery you will be having is open-heart surgery. So that means that you will have a scar that runs from the top of your rib cage down to the bottom of your rib cage. This scar will be visible your entire life. Of course, at the beginning the scar will be dark red but over time, it will fade like any other scar. You will also have two little dots for scars. One below of each lung. In order to allow for drainage after the surgery, the doctors will insert drainage tubes below your lungs. Once these tubes are not needed anymore all they have to do is give them a gentle pull and they come right out. Not stitches will be necessary. You will have some pretty neat battle scars! You are a fighter, thats for sure.

The surgery itself only takes an hour but you will be in the operating room for 4 hours. Once they get you under anesthesia they will insert all of the IV's (one in your arm and one on your neck). Then they will open your chest cavity and have to saw through a little bit of your sternum to allow for easier access to your heart. Once that is finished they will connect your heart to the heart-lung machine. Because your heart cannot be beating while it is being operated on, something else must do the work. That's where the heart-lung machine comes into play. It will pump the fluids, sugars, salts, and blood that your body needs while in surgery. The technology we have these days is incredible. Once you are stable enough to move on, the operation begins. Whether they use a piece of your own tissue or a small piece of mesh fabric the process is still the same. They place the tissue inside your hole and your heart will just grow right on top of that tissue...thus, closing it up! (During this whole process, the heart is never brought outside of the chest cavity. Your heart will always stay inside of you.) Once they are finished, they will leave your chest open for a while to make sure everything is stable and then re-start your heart so it can now pump for itself. Then they begin to close you up. They start by reconnecting your sternum by using wire. You will probably only need one or two stitches with the wire. The Dr. says that in future x-rays you will be able to see those wires on your sternum...kind of neat! Then they close your chest with dissolvable stitches.

Afterwards, you are brought to the ICU for an hour where the nurses and dr.'s will do the required assessments. After an hour, Mom and Dad can come in to see you. We won't be able to hold you at that point but at least we can see you.

During the surgery only two adults are allowed in the "inpatient waiting room." Due to lack of space they must limit the number of people that can be there. Periodically, about once an hour, the dr. will come out to let us know how things are going. If at anytime we feel like we need another update, there is a phone in the waiting room that we can use to call into the operating room and check on your status. Once you are out of surgery we will move to a different waiting room.

I hope this answers more of your questions.

You're a fighter, Sydney. You always have been. I love you.

Love, Mom